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Selling the family home

Selling the family home - Making the best of a difficult transition

By Barry Lebow (or Frances O’Flynn)

“Fifty years ago, when mom and dad bought the house, we kids had no idea it was going to be up to us to make the decision to sell.

“In those days, all we thought about was the baseball diamond in the park, the smell of home-made bread and cold evenings warmed by the fire, family and friends.

“Now, dad is dead; mom is frail and needs help with everyday activities. It’s time to make a decision. How are we ever going to be able to do this?”

The above imaginary conversation, or some variation on it, is likely taking place at millions of homes across North America. One in seven Canadians is now a senior. compared to 50 years ago when it was one in 14. That’s a lot of families in transition and it’s going to get bigger. By 2016, almost one-quarter of Canadians will be 65 or older.

This has major implications for the children of older baby boomers. Often nicknamed the sandwich generation, these families are now having to make life-changing decisions for their elderly parents, while continuing to hold down challenging full-time jobs and supporting their own children through school. It’s not an easy situation.

Of course, there are options, but when you’re emotionally involved none of them see just right. Retirement residence; nursing home; downsizing to a smaller house; condo living; in-house care; modifications to the home. To most, it’s an emotionally charged maze. Then there are all kinds of factors to consider: your parent’s age; health (both physical and mental); friends, neighbours and other supports; availability of good quality local seniors’ housing; finances; even the much loved family pet.

"And when we sell, what are we going to do with all the stuff?”

 To add to the difficulties, many children live far away from their parents and have lost their hometown contacts. Their difficult choice is to spend a great deal of time traveling back and forth to help their aging parents or find a trusted support in the area.

Enter the Accredited Senior Agent. ASAs are experienced Realtors who have taken extra courses to become designated specialists in helping senior clients and their families during this difficult transition.  An ASA will help his or her mature client and family consider all their options. Because they are familiar with local neighbourhoods as well as the many services available in their area, ASAs can help winnow down choices…Is this condo in a safe neighbourhood? Is that private home care agency the best for our circumstances?

Once the decision is made to sell the house and a new residence for mom has been selected, an ASA will also provide answers to questions like:

·  Who can tell us what things are worth?

·  What should mom take with her to her new home?

·  How do we de-clutter?

·  How do we siblings divvy up a lifetime of possessions?

·  What do we do with the things we don’t want?

·  Who will look after the house when it’s up for sale and there’s no one living here?

The ASA will interview movers and select the best. He or she will supervise the move and bring in repair people, cleaners, painters and stagers so the house will look its best when it’s listed.  It all depends on what you need. In other words, the ASA will be the trusted local support person/consultant who can take much of the pressure off the children and the aging parent.

In the first meeting, he or she will discuss a list of services she can provide and the fees attached to these services. Like any consultant, charges may be based on an hourly rate or by service or a combination of both. If you decide you would also like the ASA to list the house, the usual commission would apply.

The client always comes first and the ASA will be there for you and your parent no matter what the issue. While this transition will still be difficult for your elderly parent and for you, the ASA can be your representative on the spot saving you hours of commuting time and providing all the services you need.

If you’re interested in learning more about the Accredited Senior Agent program or want a referral to an ASA in your area, please visit www.thesenioragent.com or contact, Barry Lebow, President and Founder, Senior Housing Council, The Real Estate Academy Inc., providers of the Accredited Senior Agent designation, 416-784-9806 ext. 107